On Advice

I want to steal one out of Newton's book of physics and say "For every action there is an equal but opposite reaction." This is true when giving advice. For every negative advice, there is an equal but opposite positive advice. A negative advice is something that uses words like "don't" or "can't." Something positive does not have the word not anywhere in it.

The reason I am starting with establishing this basic rule is because negative forms of advice are not effective and may actually be counterproductive. What people tend to focus on is what tends to happen. So when we say "Don't drink and drive," it may be possible that just saying drink and drive in there will produce more drunk drivers. Rather, we should say the equal but opposite positive form "Ride Sober." This has a much more positive connotation to it and people are more likely to follow it's advice.

If you think about it for everything, you can always find the equal, but opposite form of advice.

"Anti-war" becomes "Pro-peace"
"No sexual harassment" becomes "respect others' space"
"No littering" becomes "Recycle/Throw your trash in the trash can"

These are just things that are present in culture. We focus on "no war" and "no sexual harassment," yet we live in a time where these have become more present and are becoming more present over the years.  We need a peace campaign or a respect campaign.

This applies in personal applications as well.
"Don't raise your voice" becomes "Let's calm down and talk"
"Don't buy Pepsi" becomes "Buy Coke" (Coke is better)
"Don't lie to me" becomes "Be honest with me"
"Don't leave dirty dishes in the sink" becomes "Put the dishes in the dishwasher"

It is best to sit and think for a second about how you can spin it in a positive direction and use that form of advice. It is proven that people are more likely to do what you focus on (whether you tell them to do it or not). So focus on the opposite of what you don't want them to do. They are more likely to follow your advice.

On Social Media

Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.
-Ephesians 4:29 
Learn to speak only kind things :)

This was my friend, Holly's status, and it made me think about some of my newer philosophies on social media. I remember my division manager, John Wasserman, challenged us to try to make Facebook a positive influence on people.

We should practice putting things on Facebook that will only add value to others. I tend to use motivational videos, TED talks, my blog posts (highly encouraged for you to share my blog posts), and quotes. My Facebook page is essentially a giant personal growth wall. I encourage you to do the same. You may just help somebody out there even if they don't tell you.

On Boundaries

"We predefine our boundaries."
-Christian Gouse

I personally believe every person on Earth was born to do great things. However, we set our limits as we grow based on what society tells us to set our limits to. The vast majority of people live an unremarkable life so they can have a safe job with a home. However, a person should constantly challenge themselves to improve so they truly have no boundaries at all.

The only boundaries you have are the ones you create. Nothing is impossible: I'm possible.

On Being Positive

Being positive is the best possible thing that you can do in your everyday life (I know sometimes it easier said than done.) I decided to post this because I was just talking to an awesome friend of mine, Samantha, who works at Hooters (yeah, she is a boss) and she said "I always go in with a positive attitude. I feel like if I'm happy and smiling, it'll be contagious." This is an amazing philosophy in life. I know I have had some tremendous friends in my life who walk in a room and immediately every person in the room becomes happy.

Now, caution, being negative is contagious as well. If you are leading a team and you are negative, you can really neg out the whole team. So being positive is the key to great relationships and making everything out of what you do in life (like if you were a waitress at Hooters).